Ask him who he is before responding.

February 1, 2020 (Last modified Sun Mar 3 01:01 -0500)

You try to speak, but let out a slight groan. Looks like the tunnel drink really did a number on you. Or was it that thump you felt? “Who are you,” you ask the man. “Where am I?

The man looks at you quizzically. “With all due respect, you are the one naked on my doorstep; I feel like I deserve an explanation. I ask again, who are you?

You look down, realizing that you are, indeed, naked, lying on someone’s doormat. Looks like all your things, including your clothes, got left behind after you slammed that bottle of tunnel drink.

My name’s Gregory, I-” “Ah, you! Say no more. Please, come inside. I’ve been waiting for you.” The man smiles and offers his hand to help you up. You reach out to grab it, and notice that you’re still wearing your Swolex watch. You’re confused, thinking it should’ve been left behind; but your confusion over how tunnel drink works is pushed aside by yet more confusion over the inside of this man’s house.

You enter and are greeted by a single barren wood-paneled room. In the center are two stools on either side of a pedestal. On the pedestal rests an opaque glass orb. The man sits at one stool and gestures for you to sit at the other. You oblige.

Allow me to introduce myself,” says the man. “My name is The Undertaker. I believe you have a few questions for me. I will do my best to answer them.


You are sitting across from The Undertaker. You are completely naked, aside from your only possession: a Swolex Milgauss wristwatch.

What will you ask The Undertaker?

> Ask if he has any spare clothes.

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