Ask what Mount Wrestlympus is.

February 25, 2016 (Last modified Sun Mar 3 01:01 -0500)

What’s Mount Wrestlympus?” you ask The Ultimate Warrior.

He seems irritated that you asked him. “The unfit one has much to learn…” says The Ultimate Warrior in a surprising display of calmness. You’re not sure if he’s actually calm or just quietly suppressing his rage. You don’t want to find out.

Sensing that The Ultimate Warrior is done talking, Macho Man decides to answer your question instead. “Wrestlympus is the capital of Wrestlemania. All the strongest, coolest, most experienced wrestlers live and train there. Everyone knows about it. Wrestlympus is the best place ever, man. Well, it was, until John Cena came and screwed everything up…

The Ultimate Warrior is irritated. “YOU GOTTA GO THE LONG WAY, BRO. IF YOU’VE NEVER ENTERED WRESTLYMPUS, YOU GO IN THE FRONT. THEM’S THE RULES. YOU GUYS KNOW THE WAY. SKEDADDLE!” Just as you turn to obey The Ultimate Warrior’s request, he teleports you back to the main road. You’re just north of The Rock’s tribal compound. El Disgusto decides to break his stunned silence. “Can one of you explain to me what just happened?

A crazy eternal wrestler just teleported us next door to my home,” says The Rock. “Better get movin’, don’t wanna get caught in the dark out here… Weird stuff happens out in the plains,” says Macho Man as he begins running due north along the road. You, not wanting to get left behind, start running after him.

Your group runs for hours. You’re just about ready to take a break when you spot a circular tomb-like structure out of the corner of your eye, and you stop to take a look. Your group notices and follows you over. “That’s the McMahon memorial, Gregory,” says The Rock. “After our last president Vince McMahon died, we buried him here. Unfortunately, he never arose as a ghost. We’ve tried and tried to bring him back into this world, but no one has been able to figure out how.” Just as The Rock finishes telling you about this place, you hear a familiar incoherent shouting from the tomb. “WAAAUUAUGHHHUHHG!” It must be The Ultimate Warrior. But what’s he doing here? “I don’t really want to get involved with this dude again,” says Macho Man. “It’s getting dark, though. We could set up camp inside and figure out what that crackpot’s up to this time.

Will you explore the tomb, or travel throughout the night to Wrestlympus?

> Set up camp in the tomb and look around.

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