Tell Macho Man about my misadventures since Loincloth, the Hulk encounter, my newfound musical prowess, and meating with the BBQ Pit Druids.
June 16, 2024 (Last modified Wed Oct 9 1:41 AM -0400)You take a moment to catch your breath after escaping from Macho Man’s grasp before responding. “It’s great to see you too, Macho Man. Things have been crazy since what happened in HQ, is there somewhere we could sit and talk about it?” “Oh yeah of course. Come on in to the worksite, we’ve got a table and some chairs set up inside.” Macho Man responds as he ushers your group into the wrecked building.
Inside you find what appears to be the ruins of a dormitory, though much of the interior has been burnt out and large portions of the walls have collapsed inwards. You do notice that some of the wooden floor paneling has been replaced and bricks from the collapsed walls have been neatly stacked into piles, but it seems they’ve only just begun to restore this particular building. There’s a simple wooden table in the center of the room, which is covered in construction blueprints along with a neatly stacked pyramid of cream packets. Macho Man takes a seat at the head of the table, then motions for you to sit down as well. “Now then, tell me all about the crazy shit you’ve been up to. You know I love a good story.”
“Alright, well after I drank that tunnel drink I turned up naked on The Undertaker’s doorstep. He told me he could help me perform a scrying ritual so I could find everyone else, then sent me to some tribal village called Loincloth to get some reagents for the ritual. The ritual showed me where you, The Rock, The Ultimate Warrior and Mankind ended up, and I also saw a newspaper in a sumo village that pointed me towards El Disgusto. I also learned from the ritual and some info from The Undertaker’s past that there might be something suspicious going on with Vince too.” You take a breath and a swig from one of the cream packets on the table before continuing.
“Anyways, once we finished the ritual The Undertaker offered to come with me to help fight Cena and Bubungo, and figure out what’s going on with Vince. We got a geomancer in Sumo Town to send us to Savagegrad where we picked up El Disgusto, who I guess is like the mayor now and has servants and stuff. Before we left he sent the servants to go help fight in Wrestlympus, then on the way out of town we ran into Hulk Hogan who somehow got turned into some kind of green monster by drinking Tunnel Drink or something. We managed to defeat him again and made it to Wrestler’s Rest where we picked up The Rock and helped feed some refugees, then on the way out we met with the elder of the Order of Resting Wrestlers who said he’d have the order help us out too.” You take another swig of cream, now noticing that Macho Man seems completely engrossed by your story.
“Finally, while we were on the way to Hollow Hold we started singing marching songs based on Gilbert and Sullivan, then just before we got here we encountered the BBQ Pit Druids. The druids gave me their magic meat and special BBQ shoes to make me more powerful, and I also saw some weird meat-vision that made me doubt Vince even more. But anyways, once I woke up from that we walked the rest of the way here and camped out overnight, and now we’re here!” Catching your breath after your longwinded story, you notice Macho Man now has a totally baffled look on his face.
“Alright, well I didn’t even understand half of whatever the hell you were just going on about, but it sounds to me like you made a couple new friends and are on track to find all of our old ones too? And also you got some new suspicions about President McMahon not being all he seemed? That about sum it up?” “Yeah, that pretty much covers it.” “Alright, well unless you’ve got any other tales to tell me, I’ve seen and heard some pretty crazy stuff too if you wanna hear about it.”
Is there anything else you’d like to share with Macho Man, or will you listen to his side of the story?
> Crack open a fresh cream packet and listen to Macho Man recount his experiences.
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